Humour: words you didn’t know you needed

I’ve made a few shoddy neologisms in my time (nulture, smugosphere, transruptive, ego-fodder). And I’ve enjoyed other people’s (testiculating – waving your arms around while talking bollocks). And here’s a long list of em, from the latest Scrabble newsletter (just to clarify – these are not legit scrabble words…)

Personal fave is 14, based on the Doppler Effect.

    1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the
    subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

    2. Ignoranus : A person who’s both stupid and an arsehole.

    3. Intaxicaton : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts
    until you realize it was your money to start with.

  4. Reintarnation : Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

    5. Bozone ( n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stop bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,
    shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

    6.Foreploy : Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose
    of getting laid.

    7. Giraffiti : Vandalism spray-painted very, very high

    8.Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
    person who doesn’t get it.

    9. Inoculatte : To take coffee intravenously when you are running
    late.

    10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

    11.Karmageddon : It’s like, when everybody is sending off all
    these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes
    and it’s like, a serious bummer.

    12. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day
    consuming only things that are good for you.

    13. Glibido : All talk and no action.

    14. Dopeler Effect : The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
    when they come at you rapidly.

    15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after
    you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.

    16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into
    your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

    17. Caterpallor ( n.): The colour you turn after finding half a worm
    in the fruit you’re eating.

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About dwighttowers

Below the surface...
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2 Responses to Humour: words you didn’t know you needed

  1. StartingOut says:

    So good. Thank you.

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